What Does the Xbox Two XX do?

The new xbox does everything the old one did. Except also, it doesn't.

Gluten Free

We at team microsoft have made this the first xboxe that is suitable for any diet. Worry no more about those errant pounds or dietary restrictions

It will buy you coffee

Special buying technology automatically charges your card for the price of a coffee every day. You don't acutally get a coffee. But you can imagine it.

Third Thing

It does other things. A lot of things in fact. Don't ask us though, that's for you to find out.

METT THE TEAM

The team at Micr osoft is happy to share about their work. Here's what they have to say.

Todd Bonzalez

"I've always had a passion. That's the important part. Yes I am doing this interview in the men's room, am I really that loud?"

Eve Dustice

"I suggested the name xbox as a joke and now I am cursed to work in xbox hell forever."

Rey McSriff

"We don't advertise it but we've hidden a gun in every xbox that's set to go off the moment you start thinking about getting a Playstation instead."

"This is the only Xboxe that you'll ever need. It has replaced my wife and kids."

- Bill Gates, Founder of Apple Inc.